2 questions

1) How do you tell a friend that they've hurt you without looking completely crazy? I bet you're thinking, "they're your friend, you should be able to be honest with them." Yes, I know I should be honest, but I am afraid it will make the situation worse. Sometimes confrontation, even if it's needed, doesn't always have the results you would like. Apparently safe people confront people, thereby making them safe. Couldn't you be unsafe and confront people because you're aggressive and manipulative?

Ah manipulation. I found out recently that if you are trying to control another person through your actions and decisions that that is a form of witchcraft. This makes me feel rather convicted because I know there have been times when I have acted in ways that are unholy or that are not reflective of my Christian values just to make someone do something that I want.

I can't believe I just admitted that on my blog.

2) I think a guy friend likes me and I have no idea how to deal with this. We get along amazingly well and we have all the same interests but I just, I don't know? I'm just not that into him. I need advice here, people. In no way am I trying to point out how fabulous I am that a guy likes me and I don't return the sentiment. He is really sweet and so amazingly kind and I genuinely don't want to hurt him. So...what should I do? This whole business makes me stress.

Whenever this happened in the past, the guy would supposedly take my response well and then he would not talk to me for weeks and when I would see him he would avoid me. Then when I would say that I missed his friendship he would say that I had not talked to him in weeks and that I had been ignoring him. (huh?) Then we would attempt to be friends again but it would be all weird and things just never seemed to go back to the way they were.

I had a guy once tell me that he didn't like me b/c he needed to be with some who is more relaxed. Did I flip out? No. Did I refuse to talk with him? No. Are we still friends? Oddly enough no, but I swear it's not b/c things were weird, it's b/c he moved to another city. Seriously, you may feel rejected at first (relaxed? I am SO relaxed!! What the hell?!) but you get over it and realize that said person probably has good reason for not wanting to date you. And you anticipate someone better coming along.

Really, why is it that men get all weird when a girl says they don't like them? Maybe I am being one-sided. Perhaps I am being unfair and not recognizing my part in this. Maybe I was really ignoring my friend. Did make an error? The loss of our friendship could really be ALL my fault. Hmm... I wish I didn't have to deal with these things.

Well, on that note, I am off to a meeting.